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Monthly Archives: May 2012
Naked Guy Running
Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play racquetball. Suddenly, a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head and passes the three women. As he passes the first woman, she looks down at his penis. “He’s not my husband,” she says. He passes by the … Continue reading
But Your Enemy Gets Two
O’Neil was walking home from the pub one night when lo and behold he sees one of the Little Folk. He sneaks up and catches him in is stare and demands three wishes for the little mans freedom. “Granted” says the man in green, “but whatever I do for you, O’Reily will get twofold!” Now … Continue reading
Scottish Whales
I was in a pub last Saturday night. Had a few…. and noticed two very large women at the bar. They both had strong accents so I asked… “Hey, are you two ladies from Scotland?” One of them chirped… “It’s WALES, you friggin’ idiot!” So, I immediately apologized and said… “I’m sorry. Are you two … Continue reading
Little Johnny Can Not Tell A Lie
Little Johnny lived in the country. They had to use an outhouse, and Little Johnny hated it because it was hot in the summer, cold in the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting on the bank of a creek and Little Johnny determined that one day he would push that outhouse … Continue reading
A female dentist pulls out a numbing needle to give the man a shot of Novocain. “No way! No needles. I hate needles” the patient said. The dentist starts to hook up the nitrous oxide and the man objects. “I can’t do the gas thing. The thought of having the gas mask on, suffocates me!” … Continue reading
Obama
President Obama’s approval ratings are so low now, Kenyans are accusing him of being born in the United States …