Funny Text Messages » For Men

Celibacy

admin — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 14:36:20 +0000

Celibacy can be a choice in life, or a condition imposed by circumstances.

While attending a Marriage Weekend, Frank and his wife Ann listened to the instructor declare, “It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.”
He then addressed the men.
“Can you name and describe your wife’s favorite flower?”
Frank leaned over, touched Ann’s arm gently, and whispered,
“Gold Medal-All-Purpose, Isn’t it?”

And thus began Frank’s life of celibacy.

Cowboy Condoms

admin — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 22:46:45 +0000

Cowboy: GIVE ME 3 PACKETS OF CONDOMS PLEASE.

CASHIER: DO YOU NEED A PAPER BAG WITH THAT, SIR?

Cowboy: NAH… SHE AIN’T THAT UGLY!!

Little Wonder Pills

admin — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 21:07:12 +0000

The wife told me to go to the doctor and get some of those tablets that “help” get an erection. You should have seen her face when I came back and tossed her some diet pills !

Power of Beer

admin — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 22:52:12 +0000

A man walks into a bar and begins to drink beer. After every glass of beer he pulls a picture out of his pocket and looks at it. After the 4th beer the waiter asks him why after every glass of beer he pulls the picture out and looks at it.

Then the man says: It’s a picture of my wife. When she looks good to me I’m going home

New Cameras

admin — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 15:20:30 +0000

Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such an immense shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed.